Reverse psychological words

How does someone exude such authority and power that when u walk to close to them and accidentally brush up against them they take a shocking jump back and say excuse me!  It's the most confusing hurtful thing really..it messes with my physiological understanding of human behavior.

Emotions

Feeling Stuck ....its a feeling that is all encompasing..it is  smothering it is  a dark cloud heading you're direction,stuck is a suffocating feeling that leaves you paralyzed and blinded walking in circles getting no where. Getting nowhere is the problem in the first place,see like I said stuck!

If you stay "stuck" long enuf. Eventually eaten consumes you, you're thoughts which then  control you're behaiviors. NEGATIVE beahviors  whuch begin as a way to find "your own way" out of a mess you've  inevitability Made. The problem with this is YOU cannot find you're own way out..this is why you need a savior, yes you need a friend..someone who would find a way to refocus your dark thoughts into somthing..anything of a light nature. Oh how I long to be rid of this overwhelming darkness that creeps its way into my head and soul more often than I'd like to admit.

Mostly I feel dammed of I do and dammed if I dont..so I error on the side of dont.therefore nothing happens .
And the circle  begins again, with no hope for a end.

DISLIKE

😞

Have you known someone who absolutely  finds you annoying on almost  every level? Someone  that gives you looks that could kill? Sensed  their aura oozing with distain for you and the things you do ? And Even when you try to  ignore that someone,thier over dramatic  stares,   heavy brethes  you can feel them inside somewhere deeply even without knowing? What if that someone were a  Family member,someone close someone who's DNA you share?  

I know someone like this.

And... today  it's too much to bear.in fact each day that goes by my ability to be strong and brave diminishes  and I become weaker and weaker.succumbing to the  quick  reliable pain  relief coping mechanism  which I've created  for myslef for the last 15 years. What I suffer from isn't simply and eating disorder..it's a full blown case of self hatred self punishment and  self neglect.  It has become extremely and has become so much a part of my habits and normal daily activities  that it really requires  deep thoughthe to recognize  that they are not normal, nor are they they way my hevan ly father created my brain to think. I need to chew  on this for the nigjt..with some prayer and hope that tommorow  I will be able to bear the burden once more.

NEWBIE

I'm new to this  whole blogging thing..so for my purposes  I am using it as a way to write and vent my feelings..you know the real ones deep inside,uncensored, those  that are closet to my heart and lead me to act upon them for some relief.You'll notice I'm not a huge Grammer or punctuation user, perhaps because my brain is simply trying get to spill out theese feeling gs I've held in for so long.

Anyways read if you want and don't read if you don't want..Take me as I am.

Here goes everything.